Continuation of Captivity Meme

[werewolf_hacker]

For adversarially and rebelle_elle.

Start of adversarially's thread: here.

Start of rebelle_elle: here

Comments

[werewolf-hacker.livejournal.com]

Continued from here, for rebelle_elle.

He huffs out a gasp. I can't. I am physically incapable of that.

And I-- I'm not playing their game, Elle. I'm not.

[werewolf-hacker.livejournal.com]

For adversarially, continued from here.

[adversarially.livejournal.com]

[Shai smirks and takes a huge bite of the bloodied hunk in his hand, chewing with his mouth obscenely open.] Well. I don't pick my pets for their brains, Benji.

Now. Open up.

[rebelle-elle.livejournal.com]

Then we're all dead, Ben. They'll torture us. And I won't heal, Ben. I won't heal.

[werewolf-hacker.livejournal.com]

[He shakes his head.] Neither did Prissy. I couldn't do it for her either.

[werewolf-hacker.livejournal.com]

[Between fangs.] I am not. Your fuckin' pet.

... I can't.

[adversarially.livejournal.com]

Can't. Really. I wonder what Galiel has to say about that. [Shaitan cups a hand around one ear.] Oh, right, nothing.

Don't act like I won't fucking do it, puppy.

[werewolf-hacker.livejournal.com]

[He turns his face to the floor.] I know you will.

But I can't. I'm sorry, Galiel...

[adversarially.livejournal.com]

[Galiel makes a strangled, whimpering attempt to be comforting, and Shaitan throws his head back and laughs contemptuously.] Fuck, you two are pathetic, you know that?

[werewolf-hacker.livejournal.com]

[He doesn't move his head.] Coming from you, I'll take that as a compliment, asshole.

[rebelle-elle.livejournal.com]

So that's it, then? You're just going to let me and Guri and Anachiel die?

[She looks over her shoulder as men come in, locking the door behind them. When she turns back, her eyes are wide and panicked.] Please don't let them do it to me, Ben. Don't let them hurt me! You know what they'll do!

[adversarially.livejournal.com]

Oh, shut up. Whiny little bitch. "Blah blah blah they killed my girlfriend, blah blah heroin, blah blah blah scars. Waaahh, I follow Daddy's rules, you can't have my soul, I'm so sorry I can't, waahhh waaaah."

[Shaitan sneers.] You could be a fucking god if you'd give in to what's in you instead of watering it down for the sake of some arbitrary notion of "goodness." All that Wrath going to fucking waste. All that strength and all that power untouched and useless. Fucking weak. Ass. Bitch. [And he punctuates each word with a kick.]

[werewolf-hacker.livejournal.com]

The insurgents fed the wolf children. And I can't. I just can't fight a baby angel.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Ellie...

[rebelle-elle.livejournal.com]

[Elle screams as the men pull her away, kicking at them and trying to twist out of their grasp as they pull her into the shadows.]

[And then she's sitting behind him, watching the scene over his shoulder as the men disappear into the darkness. She's covered in blood, her face slashed as if by claws.] You ask me, this is what really makes you a monster, Bennie Boy. Will you ever stop letting other people get hurt and do nothing but watch?

[werewolf-hacker.livejournal.com]

[Gasping. Cracked ribs are now very broken, thanks.] Be a god. Like you?

[He huffs out a laugh.] But you suck.

[werewolf-hacker.livejournal.com]

[His arms never move from over his head.] People are gonna get hurt no matter what I do. I can't stop evil people from being evil.

But I can be not evil myself.

Fighting a baby angel would be evil. I won't do it.

[rebelle-elle.livejournal.com]

[She watches him, unimpressed.] You didn't even try. You didn't even suggest alternatives. You refused to help at all.

You just apologized for being so pathetic and did nothing.

Evil, Ben. Very evil. Letting people you say you care for get hurt like that...

[werewolf-hacker.livejournal.com]

You think this is my first rodeo? You think they'll take any suggestion I make? You think I wouldn't rather take your place? You think I wouldn't rather they hurt me instead of you?

People like this have one playbook. "Do what we want or we'll hurt the people you care about, because that hurts you more than just torturing you." It's what they do.

[rebelle-elle.livejournal.com]

I'd rather not be dead right now, Ben.

But you're right. Thinking you would have preferred to take my place, that totally kept me from not dying. That's how much it mattered.

[werewolf-hacker.livejournal.com]

Don't you get it? It doesn't matter. Nothing I do matters. There will always be slaves, there will always be Black Markets and brothels, there will always be Pits. No matter how many I take down, three more will spring up to take their place.

And these people will always, always, always use the people I care about against me. And I... really don't want to think about the solution to that.

[rebelle-elle.livejournal.com]

What are you afraid of, Ben? Going dark?

Finally being strong?

[werewolf-hacker.livejournal.com]

[He barks out an entirely humorless laugh.] Going dark? Do you know how may people I've killed in the last year? I've committed mass murder on a scale that puts the worst serial killer in history to shame. My hands are black with blood.

And it's easy. It's easy to walk into a place like that brothel and coldly decide that every human in the place down to the fuckin' janitor needs to die.

And then carry it out. Even if one of those people is a woman and I don't kill women.

[rebelle-elle.livejournal.com]

[She looks toward the shadows where the men disappeared.] You just did, Ben. Someone you said you cared for, too.

But I guess that was as much a lie as you saying you wanted to protect me.

[werewolf-hacker.livejournal.com]

[He flinches as if from a blow.] Just because I want to protect people doesn't mean I can.

And I can't protect anyone from the kind of evil these people perpetrate. Not you, not Tziporel. Not me. All I can do is not actively participate.

[rebelle-elle.livejournal.com]

Thanks, Ben.

My corpse appreciates your lack of active participation. [A worm pushes its way out from under her eye and falls to the ground, and she takes a moment to shove a patch of skin back into place.]

Have you ever seen an angel's body? Of course, Guri barely counts anymore. He was so happy to fly, too.